Thursday, July 14, 2011

Who am I?

I think I created a similar post before, I've been asking this question myself many a times.

And recently I chanced upon a forum thread with regards to a secondary four student sending a letter to the ministry telling them that there is something really really wrong with our education system.

Although she might not be 100% correct but I applaud her for her courage.

And so here's a snippet of my really, really long reply with regards to her even longer letter:

"So that comes to the question about the thing primary and secondary never taught me. Or perhaps they thought we were too immature to learn. At the end of the day, the biggest why I have is "Who am I?" Not answered in a scientific way that I'm made up of my organs etc, not answered in a politic way that we're born to serve the nation, help the economic, give birth to more children so the human race doesn't die off.

But "Who am I?", "What's my purpose in this world?", "What are my talents (outside school, outside the normal talents like music and arts)?", "Why am I introvert?", "Why do I act this way?", "Why do I think this way?"

This questions were never answered. Parents had no answer to it. Teachers had no answer to it and send me to a counselor because I had negative thoughts (thanks ah). Counselor had no answer to it instead she flaunt her daughter's magnificent grades to me (You're hinting to me just study and shut up?).

All these weren't answered till I went poly, till I was in contact with philosophy which resulted me in looking up on psychology and horoscope later on in my life. I'm still an amateur at it and I've more to learn. At least for know I know "Who am I". It can't be expressed verbally but I know."

Another snippet from a Forumner's reply "To expect these questions to be answered by the system is something that simply can't be done. These questions require much introspection upon the person to reflect upon him/herself, because the answer can only be found within."

And MY reply is "I agree. But the problem is the education system in primary and secondary school life didn't even give me an opening or a headstart. I've no idea the reason for what went wrong. I was lost. I was depressed. I was negative.

I get thrown back my answer. And they send me to a counselor expecting it will help. But end up at the end of the day, everyone was only concerned about my grades and not how I feel mentally. I believed if something went wrong, just something bad went wrong, I might probably go insane."

This probably can be debated further making it an endless post, but let's just end it here for the time being, besides I haven't got a reply back yet.

It's intriguing to finally get a decent debate in a forum and I'm not getting shoot at yet, hopefully not.

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